Jennifer Nine reviews The Bends by Radiohead, 11th March 1995

Jennifer Nine reviews The Bends by Radiohead, 11th March 1995.

So here’s the Radiohead review I referred to in the previous post on Gene. You won’t catch Thom posing like this these days so lap it up Radiohead fans. Look at that belly button….phwooorrrrhhhh!

I don’t know how long or how many listens a typical record reviewer gets but probably not much. So fair play to Jennifer Nine for calling it on this. I resisted this record for so long. I just thought of Radiohead as major label bandwagon jumpers that had joined the party far too late. But by this time I’d started working and was subject to the communal musical tastes of my co-workers. So The Bends slowly ground me down, little by little, track by track.

These days I’ll begrudgingly admit to it being a quite good even though I still think the lyrics are impenetrable nonsense.

More C4 hypocrisy tonight with a teenager being cajoled into having vaginal cosmetic surgery in Embarrassing Teenage Bodies only a few weeks after Dawn Porter’s Lisa Roger’s C4 documentary/polemic about about the ‘growing epidemic’ and pointless stupidity of genital plastic surgery.

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Thanks to Richard for leaving a comment pointing out my error in initially identifying Dawn Porter and not Lisa Rodgers as the presenter of The Perfect Vagina.

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andrew-mueller-reviews-radiohead-live-8th-april-1995

Andrew Mueller reviews Radiohead live at The Forum, London. Photo Steve Gullick.

13 years later can we name the others in the band yet? Well there’s Johnny Greenwood and there’s another Greenwood, a brother, but I can’t think of his name off the top of my head. And then there’s an Ed something or other but the drummer, the drummer I still can’t name. Which is all the more funny because I’ve just remembered that I have actually met him at Reading Festival. 1998 I think. A friend I was with knew Radiohead from growing up in Oxford and he joined us for a drink. I am sure we were introduced but then I’m terrible with names as I’ve just proved so who knows. All I know is that I don’t know his name.

Radiohead are supposedly big on the environment aren’t they? It’s a good enough link. Please do take the time to watch this brilliant, brilliant animation about climate change and its causes. 10 minutes very, very well spent – I guarantee you that you’ll learn something. Apparently Thom Yorke employs a woman to trawl the web for him, searching out things he might like and bringing them to his attention. Well Thom – you should like this.

http://wakeupfreakout.org/film/tipping.html

Elsewhere Neil Kulkarni expresses his love for Coventry while in the process of reviewing Eat Static at Coventry University and Lisa Hoftijzer (who?…anyone?) is “moved deeply…to the bar” (drum splash) by The Mission at Rock City, Nottingham. Which reminds me of another little memory from around this time.

It’s early morning, 6am or thereabouts and I stagger, bleery eyed, into Hereford train station cafe. I don’t expect to see many people at this time of the morning but I certainly don’t expect to see the whole of the fucking Mission sat around a table playing cards, waiting for the London train. One of them has a copy of The Independent. One of them is wearing shorts. This is all I can remember. They sit on the train at the next table to me. They carry on playing cards all they way to Reading where they get out but not one of them speaks for the entire journey. I don’t know if they’d had an argument or what but it definitely felt odd, more than odd in fact, it felt grim. And tedious. It made being in a band seem like really fucking hard work, which I suppose it is, especially when you’ve been flavour of the month and are still flogging a dead horse 10 years after the adulation has faded. I suppose this is why I’ve managed to remember it. Having said that I probably never would have if I hadn’t sat down to scan this in tonight so thanks for jogging my memories Lisa, whoever and wherever you are.

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Various album reviews including Massvie Attack vs The Mad Professor

Ian Watson reviews S*M*A*S*H’s mini-LP

Dave Simpson reviews The Very Best of Cream

David Stubbs reviews Massive Attack vs The Mad Professor

Simon Reynolds on recommended Krautrock records.

On reading David Stubbs admission that he used to make up his record review catalogue numbers (towards the bottom of the page) I was really curious to find an example and test the theory. This is the first I’ve found.

I’m not posting to prove a point at all, but it does seem that in this particular example the catalogue number isn’t made up – check the catalogue number here. I’m slightly disappointed now though – I was all set to file a late complaint. Will keep looking for further evidence.

You’d imagine that the implementation of something like this would be out of some form of long held tradition or legacy from ye olden dayes but the early (from this blog’s period) Maker reviews never had catalogue numbers. All of which begs the question – whose idea was this and why did they think it was necessary?

Keeping with the Stubbs theme of this post I also read this today which reminded me of the very, very funny Mr. Agreeable rant on the subject of Virgin Media. There’s also a very funny quasi spat between Stubbs & Mueller re Krautrock vs Cuntry on Facebook from the time they had some sort of DJ battle – read from the bottom of the page up.

Oh and S*M*A*S*H were always shite and we did forget they existed. No, I never saw them live. No, I don’t care. Taylor Parkes interview with S*M*A*S*H here – I think he concurs. Curiously the article begins by saying he reviewed the Mini-LP so I’m a little confused by this bit but it worth reading all the same. That last link from this blog “exploring the work of obscure and overlooked bands” that links to Archived Music Press.

I met one of my musical heroes last night. The conventional wisdom goes that you’re not supposed to meet your heroes because they’ll only end up disappointing you, but I think it’s more so that you can’t make a tit of yourself. He didn’t. Let’s hope I didn’t but I have my doubts.

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Singles reviewed by Andrew Mueller, 18th March 1995

I’m not going to say anything about the photo. Nope, nothing.

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3 album reviews

Caitlin Moran reviews Red House Painters, Ocean Beach

Andrew Mueller reviews Bruce Springsteen, Greatest Hits

David Bennun reviews Tangerine Dream, Various.

Taken from Melody Maker March 25th 1995

Three ‘jokers’ on one page, but the reason I chose this was for the Caitlin Moran review, who was always, always brilliant in my opinion. She’s now over at the Times where she (mostly) writes about her children in quite staggering detail. Word has it that she’s about to hit our TV screens soon with a show about Pop Culture.


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Fatima Mansions live at the Limelight Club June 15th 1991

Andrew Mueller reviews Fatima Mansions at the Limelight Club, Belfast. Taken from Melody Maker June 15th 1991.

After recent pieces from Stubbs and Reynolds it seems only fitting to complete the triumvirate with something from Mueller. It’s amused me to read this on Wikipedia outlining Triumvirate “though the three are usually equal on paper, in reality this is rarely the case”

Others will be much better placed to tell me but from my memory wasn’t Andrew Mueller the most consistently funny of the three? Naturally, if any of the individuals in question want to pitch in to set the record straight with some retrospective analysis they’d be most welcome – as is the traffic Simon – thanks.

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